Aunty Em

Sharing is Caring. Agony Aunty advice column

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner…

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So, with Valentine’s day just around the corner everyone is either getting loved up or wishing that everyone who was would just disappear. Valentines day has become more of a  holiday. Shops were already stocked with heart shaped chocolates in velvet red boxes and fluffy teddy bears to be bought for your loved one. Here are some tips for being able to survive the inevitable loved up day regardless of your romantic situation.

Do not force yourself to find a date on Valentine’s day. It really isn’t the end of the world if  you are dateless on Valentine’s day. If you are already with someone, don’t use this day as a way of keeping it going, or it being a measure of how much they mean to you. If the relationship is already floundering it would be better to let go and keep happy rather than let it spiral into a miserable experience.

Gift giving. If you are intending to buy gifts for one another but have no idea what to buy or what to expect, talk about it! Don’t set your expectations too high though, remember it’s one day out of 365. Hint at gifts you might like, eg. chocolate, lingerie, music. But don’t be disheartened if you’re given something you weren’t expecting. Remember, the other person, may be feeling the same pressure about gifts and didn’t have any clue as to what to give. The easiest way to avoid this is to TALK!

Don’t be alone. Plan a night out with other friends, and invite everyone, not just the singles! Celebrate being single with your friends by enjoying a great day out, lunch with the girls or getting your groove on on the dance floor. Be happy, don’t worry about what you haven’t got and look at what you do have.

I hope these 3 little tips will help you through the Valentine’s day hubbub. Enjoy yourself, be with friends and remember, being single is not the end of the world, it’s just the beginning.

Lots of Love,

Aunty Em x

 

P.S. Remember to send me an email with any questions to aunty_em@rocketmail.com 

P.P.S. Also I’ve had some requests to add my Twitter account, so if you’d like to follow my everyday goings on you can find me at EmmaLouWagstaff 

How can you tell if a guy is gay without having to ask them?

The answer to this is that you can’t!

I recently had a letter written to me on this matter so I thought I would write a post about it, as I think many women face the same difficulty in knowing if the guy they like is homosexual.

There are guys out there who have the most effeminate mannerism known to man who could be the straightest guy in the world, and there are also tough, butch looking guys who are gay. The stereotype of a gay man is well and truly out of the window these days. It is much the same case as if you were to look at someone and guess where they are from. A lot of people assume I am Arabic, Lebanese, Iranian, Southern Italian, Serbian or Spanish. I am none of those! I am in fact mixed race! I am a mix of English and Indian but no one ever gets that until I tell them. Most of the time you would be wrong because nobody really fits the stereotype given to a certain race anymore, much like homosexuals, too.

The real question here is “why does it even matter?” Going through university and travelling the world, I have met many people but their sexuality has never really played on my mind. A year a go, I found out my best friend is gay. I had no idea! I guess I had my suspicions from the stories she would tell me, but the honest truth is that I love her no matter who makes her happy, as long as she is happy!

If you happen to be interested in a guy that you aren’t sure is gay or not, ask him out! If he is gay he will probably say no or just tell you he’s not into women. Either way you’ll know where you stand.

The only way to tell is if he tells you and if he is telling the truth!

I hope this helps if you are having a similar dilemma, honesty is key and sharing is caring!

Lots of love,

Aunty Em x

P.S. Don’t forget to send an email if you have any issues that you want advice and help with, I will do my best to answer all of them either on here or via responding to the email! Send them to: aunty_em@rocketmail.com

Aunty Em’s Tips For Doing The Long Distance Thing!


I have been in a long distance relationship for almost 3 years(he lives in London, whereas I have moved around from Cornwall, Norwich, Paris and soon Argentina!). We have had our ups and downs but they are mostly the same as a non-long distance relationship. I met my partner whEent I was still living in Cornwall, whilst he lived in London. That meant we had a good 5 hour drive/train ride separating us. It didn’t matter to me how far away he was, I just knew I wanted to be with him and he felt that same way (this helped things a lot!). I soon moved to Norwich to start University so I was still 2 hours away yet this felt so much closer after being 300 miles away from him before. I truly believe a long distance relationship can work, if both of you are willing to make it work that is. You both have to commit to making it work, otherwise it will only be a matter of time before  it begins to fall apart. So here are a few tips that I feel seem to help:

Tip One: Do not mope. Now this can be quite difficult if you know you won’t see them for a long time, but you have to remember that life goes on. Just because they are not standing by your side physically does not mean that they aren’t there in your thoughts and you in theirs. It can be so easy to fall into a slight depression when they aren’t around but see this space as an opportunity to get things done. If you are at school, get your homework finished early so you have more free time to go out and enjoy life; if you have work, take the space as a way of relaxing and being in control and independent. You’ll notice time will go faster if you keep yourself focused on work/school matters and then, before you know it, you’ll be waiting at the train station for that train to pull in and see that familiar face you’ve been dreaming about. You may notice that you appreciate the time you have together much more, rather than feeling the urge to have some space now and then if they were to always be around.

Tip Two: Talk regularly. This can be hard depending on the situation of work, where you’re living etc, but make sure you make time to talk. Even if it’s an email/text message in the morning to say ‘I love you’, a little reassurance that they are on your mind goes a long way! If you are living in different countries, try to compromise and set aside a time to have a ‘Skype Date’. You can get all fancy with this and even try and time it to make it seem like you’re on a dinner date! Just make sure you are willing to take time out to talk to them.

Tip Three: Tell them if you are upset. Especially if it’s a guy, he will not be able to tell if you are being off with him over text so you may as well just spit it out so you can resolve the issue. Most of the time it will probably all boil down to the fact that you miss them.

Ok so here are a few to get you started. I hope they help. If you have any you think are worth sharing, please just add a comment below as I would love to see them. Advice is for sharing. And sharing is caring, right?!

Remember if you have a question, email me at aunty_em@rocketmail.com.

I’ll write soon,

Lots of love,

Aunty Em x

The First… of many!

Dear all,

I am a blog that answers questions and gives advice on general everyday life. I will work much like an agony aunt column that you see in newspapers! If you need some advice but don’t know who to ask, feel free to drop me an email at aunty_em@rocketmail.comI can either respond to you personally through an email response or if it seems to be quite a popular matter I can post a response to the blog for others to read in case they are having the same difficulties and need answers! It will be totally anonymous, you can make up a name or leave no name at all, I will never publicly post your name on the blog!

So here we go, my first advice post will be up next and I will be posting tips on how to deal with a long distance relationship.

If you have any questions, need advice, or just someone to listen please don’t hesitate to write to me:

aunty_em@rocketmail.com.

Lots of love,

Aunty Em x

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